Oh, my lovely readers…I have not forgotten about you. Your “Queen” has been resting on ‘the throne’ (literally) with a time consuming illness. My little pea brain has been so foggy lately, I couldn’t form a sentence if I wanted to. Alas, I am feeling better and ready to force feed you some new, juicy material. Disclaimer: The “Queen” can not be held responsible for the following information, errors and lack of humor will all be justified due to being heavily medicated and also the inability to type while restrained in a straight jacket.
Romeo, Romeo..where for art thou, Romeo? No really, where the hell is that bastard? So, you’re waiting for “the one”? Well, go ahead and join the damn club. I’ve been waiting for the “one”, the “two” and the “three”, etc as long as I can remember. When Lawd? When’s gone be my time? How long must I continue to tramp along with “Old Maid” stamped on my forehead? Geez, I’m starting to think that the Scarlet Letter would be much easier, at least everyone would know I was getting some action.
Look, I’m going to go ahead and be honest, I don’t believe in “the one”. I’ve mentioned that in previous posts, I think. I think there are hundreds of people that each of us could possibly be compatible with. I mean, what is it about this whole “the one” bullshit? Tell me this: What if your “the one” accidentally got involved with someone else, doesn’t that throw the whole “the one” theory off? I’m just saying. I know, don’t be upset..it’s hard to swallow the “there is no “the one” pill. Doesn’t it make you feel better though knowing that you aren’t just searching for one person? I mean, who in the hell feels like searching for Waldo anyway? With my theory, you’ll have more of an option, more of a selection..don’t ya think? Hey, it’s just a thought…just a theory.
1)Fall In Love…..With Yourself: Yes, I said it. I spent years searching for the true meaning of love while secretly manifesting self-hatred. How in the hoo ha did I expect myself to fall in love if I didn’t even love myself? If you are searching for a healthy relationship with someone, you must be in love with yourself. Look pal, don’t get loving yourself and narcissism confused. Loving yourself is accepting yourself for who you are. Capiche?
2)Chose Or Be Chosen: You can wonder around the single world as a chooser or as the chosen. Be confident, don’t sit around and wait to be chosen by someone. Don’t be like a little puppy at the pound shop waiting for your new owner to pick you up. You must know what you want, live your life and choose accordingly without settling.
3)Laws Of Attraction: Oh yes, like attracts like. So, what are you looking for in a mate? Honesty? Integrity? Faithfulness? Considerate? You can’t go along boasting about what kind of person you want if you aren’t practicing the same characteristics. You can’t strive to find someone who is positive if you are a negative person. No positive person will want to hang out with you if you are negative. Again, like attracts like.
If love is what you are looking for, love is what you must give. You need to try to be loving in every aspect of your life. Checking out at the grocery store? Compliment the cashier. Just finished eating at a chic restaurant? Leave a good tip. Someone pulls out in front of you? Give them the middle finger, err I mean…smile and wave. It’s all about practicing love. Yes, it sounds cheesy but if like attracts like, you probably know what you need to do.
4)Stay Active: There is no way you are going to meet that special someone if you are stuck inside your house. You must live your life to the fullest and don’t focus so much on meeting someone. Go out into the world and focus on making friends. You never know when a friend will turn into a lover. Live an active lifestyle, be productive, get involved and sooner or later love might sneak it’s way in.
5)Stop Looking: You’ve heard it before, you know, the love birds that say “As soon as I finished looking for someone, he came out of nowhere”. This happens all the time. If you put so much focus on finding someone, you are more likely to settle for anyone. Go on about your business. Don’t make finding someone a priority.
So, that’s it for today folks. I think the key ingredient for finding love is first being emotionally stable and loving yourself. You must go out into the world with confidence as the chooser. Don’t allow yourself to be chosen. You must know what you want and who you want and you must not settle for less. If you are looking for someone with certain characteristics, be sure to mirror these. You know, the laws of attraction. Good luck on your journey and when you find the person of your dreams, ask’em if they have a brother.
Comments Sho Are Appreciated!
04/28/09 Finding Your Soul Mate 13 Comments
Hello Queen! Bravo another wonderful post…I’m featuring it in next weeks newsletter…if I get a great response I will feature you weekly depending on the topic if that is ok with you…please let me know as I know you will get lots of hits…;) Donna
Gotta tell ya, I did manifest my ideal partner – and now 6 years later, I still adore him (and he adores me, too, thank You, God!). You’re right on with this, My dear Queen, and keep it up – he’s a comin’ round the mountain when he comes, doncha know?
‘Course, I got some secrets to how I manifested my sweet little darlin’, which I’m happy to share…
Hugs, Rev. Anne (The Other Queen)
I always love how you tell it like it is! You are a QUEEN!! Glad you are feeling better – I was sick with strep throat, fever last week and fell behind on writing as well.
This is a good post – LOVE YOURSELF really is key! ALL the self-help-find-love-now type books say that too! I can’t love myself anymore! HA HA!! Thanks for the inspiration chica!
Hope you are feeling better! I totally agree with the first one! You have to Love yourself first. No one else can complete you and untill you are happy alone then you won’t be happy with someone else! Have you read the book the Secret?? I have It’s all about positive thinking…I highly recommend it!
Jen
The stop looking one is really interesting to me. I wonder how much this applies to life. Maybe when we have such a strong agenda it actually repels what is more appropriate for us.
Bravo, what fun, and what truth!!!. What FREEDOM, and JOY comes with the realization of this. I can’t help but say, that it is better to be alone than to wish that you were alone So no more settling girls!!! love yourself enough to demand respect! as of course you also give it right!!!! Two way street you know! Be your all powerful and competent selves, and know that you deserve love and happiness in your life. Don’t settle for less! Love you Queen and love you girls Ruby
Bravo, what fun, and what truth!!!. What FREEDOM, and JOY comes with the realization of this. I can’t help but say, that it is better to be alone than to wish that you were alone So no more settling girls!!! love yourself enough to demand respect! as of course you also give it right!!!! Two way street you know! Be your all powerful and competent selves, and know that you deserve love and happiness in your life. Don’t settle for less! Love you Queen and love you girls Ruby
Hope you are having a great week!
My beautiful Ruby- Thank so much for stopping by! You are so right about ‘it’s better to be alone than to wish you were alone’, man I’ve been there several times before. When I finally took a ’single’ break from dating nearly 12 years I actually enjoyed being alone. Actually, I think I enjoyed it a little too much. You are so right, all women and men alike deserve happiness but first we must be happy with ourselves, right?
My opinion is this: We all do have “The one” out there somewhere. The one who (out of the numerous other ones that we can jell with as you stated), is the best of the lot. The one who is just that much better than the other ones.
I like the way you presented your ideas here, very good
As it so happens, I am at this moment working on a post about a tenant of relationships, a basics in which to start. I hope it not only makes sense, but can actually make people think and even help them in relationships!
My opinion is this: We all do have “The one” out there somewhere. The one who (out of the numerous other ones that we can jell with as you stated), is the best of the lot. The one who is just that much better than the other ones.
I like the way you presented your ideas here, very good As it so happens, I am at this moment working on a post about a tenant of relationships, a basics in which to start. I hope it not only makes sense, but can actually make people think and even help them in relationships!
Bobby Boy-I’m still hesitant to say that I believe in “the one”. Am I jaded? Am I a Bah-Hum-Bugger? Maybe so. I do think there is someone out there for me that can be the ying to my yang, but I also think there is someone out there for me that can be the cheese to my burger. I am interested in your post that you are writing. I read so many blogs, I keep forgetting which one is yours. Will you send me the link?
I think stop looking is the best one that many people don’t realize. It’s easy to get into this self pity party of “why am i still single?” – but when you are out enjoying life you are happier, and the happier you are, the more likely others will enjoy being around you – and yup, maybe even fall in love too
I think stop looking is the best one that many people don’t realize. It’s easy to get into this self pity party of “why am i still single?” – but when you are out enjoying life you are happier, and the happier you are, the more likely others will enjoy being around you – and yup, maybe even fall in love too
Chelle- You’re right, I always hear “The moment I stopped looking, I found him/her”. I think we push so much focus on finding someone that we totally ignore our requirements for a person and take whatever we can get, settling. We need to learn to be the choosers and realize that it’s okay to be alone. I think you have to be alone and happy before you can be happy with someone else.
Love it! When I’m really happy and enjoying life, people are drawn to me like moths to a flame. It’s usually when I’m really happy in a relationship that men crawl out of the cracks of nowhere and flock to my side. =)
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