The Queen of Relationships

So, let’s say that your friend is trying to set you up on a date. You are extremely excited and nervous at the same time. You envision the first date going well and cross your fingers that you don’t get broccoli stuck in your teeth. Going out on dates can sometimes be nerve racking. You worry if you will have chemistry. You wonder what the conversation will be about.  You might even be concerned if the other person is even going to like you. All you can really do is be yourself. If things go accordingly, then great. If it doesn’t go so well, then you can just chalk it up as a learning experience. Are you feeling unsure about how your date will go? Are you looking for some dating tips that will help you along the way? Never fear, The Queen is here. (I’m sorry I couldn’t resist)

1)Getting Ready and Being Prepared: First of all, there will be no freaking out about this date. The more worked up you get about the date, the more goofy you will seem. You need to make sure that you have talked to your date and have made arrangements. You should both discuss the time you are meeting, where to meet and where you will be meeting each other. It’s okay to go out and buy yourself a new outfit for the date. Go ahead, you deserve it. Yes, I know, that sounded cheesy.

Always remember that less is more. You definitely don’t want to look like you just stepped out of a rap video. Please try to keep it simple and sexy. From what I hear, guys do not like girls to wear a lot of flashy jewelry. It’s okay to have a few pieces here and there but don’t over do it. Also, go easy on the perfume, you do not want to smell like a Saigon whore. Men should do the same. Try to go easy on the cologne and be sure to pick out a nice outfit suitable for the occasion.

So, where are the two of you going? The man usually decides on this one. If ihe does happen to put the ball in your court, do not respond with “I don’t care” or “I don’t know” or “It doesn’t matter to me”. Show him that you are confident in your decision making and surprise him with a fabulous idea.

2) Timing Is Everything: On the phone, the two of you should have discussed by now and figured out where ya’ll are going and what time you are to meet. Is he picking you up at your house? Are you catching a taxi? Whatever is, just make sure you don’t miscommunicate. Timing is everything on a first date. Have you ever had to wait on someone when you had an appointment or date set? It’s aggravating as hell. Being on time shows more than having the ability to look at a clock and tell time. It shows you have respect for the other person.

Don’t go for the “fashionably late” tip. This is only implemented when going to parties. Being on time shows your date that you are respectful and that you can manage your time. The last thing a guy wants to hear is you apologizing because you had to work on your hair. A woman really doesn’t want to hear you say that you had to watch the last inning of the game. So, look great, be confident and be on time or else you will turn into a pumpkin. Okay, all except that last part.

3) Minding Your Manners: There’s nothing worse than a man or woman who doesn’t mind their manners. Didn’t your mamma teach you manners? Well, not is the time to dust them off and start using them. If men are going to pick the woman up for a date, they need to be sure that they open the car door for the lady. Also, be sure to open all doors going in and out of places. This will score you major brownie points. Who doesn’t love brownies?

You want to know a really big “no no” while on a date? Cellphones. This can make a date go sour in minutes. I had a friend that went out on a date with a girl and he stayed on his cellphone the whole time. It was obvious he wasn’t digging her but if he was, he might as well nip that in the bud. She will no longer be interested. Women and Men both want your full attention during the date. You made plans to do something with them not the person on the other end of the cellphone.

I don’t think that your date will be too concerned about which fork you are using to eat your dinner. Obviously, you will not want to burp your ABC’s or let one rip. I mean you can if you won’t but I wouldn’t advise it. It would be pretty funny though. That should be filed under “How To Lose A Date In Five Minutes”.

4) Starting A Conversation This is probably one of the most important tips and a dater’s concern. What ever will you talk about? How will the conversation go? Will it have some sort of flow or will their be crickets chirping? It’s good to have an idea of what you want to talk about before you go. Of course, please don’t rehearse it in front of a mirror. That’s just creepy. Just have a few things in mind that you would like to chat about. If you’re lucky, you both will get along great and you won’t have to worry about conversation.

Here are a few ideas to think about when trying to start a conversation with your date!

1. What’s your bra size? (Totally kidding)
2. What do you do in your free time?
3. Do you have any hobbies or interest?
4. What are your dreams/goals?
5. Tell me a little bit about your friends.
6. What about your family?

Be careful about what you talk about. You do not want to jump in to any ‘deep’ conversation on a first date. Politics and religion shouldn’t be touched. This is a time for you to get to know one another not a time to discuss the economy. Try not to talk about work for too long. This can be extremely boring and it makes it seem as if you are a workaholic.

The biggest conversation No No of them all is…*drum roll please*….talking about your ex’s. This is the biggest, hugest, largest, ________ ever! Never and I mean never talk about your ex on first date. Even if the other person brings it up try to slowly change the subject to something more interesting. Really, what’s so interesting about your ex anyway? If you can’t weasel your way out of the conversation, you must always be sure to say polite things about  your ex.  A huge red flag will go up when a guy/girl hears you talk bad about an ex. This will make them think that you hav
e some serious emotional baggage. Well, do you? If that’s the case then maybe you aren’t ready to date just yet.

Also, be careful of any sexual innuendos. It’s fun to joke around and flirt but if you make too many sexual comments, the other person might get the wrong idea. If you are looking for a one night stand, go ahead with the sexual comments. Be perverted as you want. If you are looking for something long-term and something that has the possiblity to bloom, stay away from them. You can be sexy and flirtacious without seeming like you are a horn ball. Ahh, I love that word.
5)Be Confident: There’s nothing worse than a attractive woman/man with no self-confidence. It doesn’t matter how awesome you look, if you don’t have any confidence then you might as well be ugly. Seriously though, the opposite sex is attracted to people that are confident. Of course, you don’t want to be cocky or arrogant. You have to know how to have a healthy balance. You need to come across and confident and put together. So, you don’t have any confidence? I always say “fake it til you make it”. Even if you are lacking in the confidence department, tell yourself you are awesome, beautiful and intelligent. Believe it, just don’t repeat it to yourself in the mirror. That’s just weird.

You know what confident people do? Confident people are not afraid to give someone a compliment. If you are somewhat insecure then you probably have trouble giving other people compliments. Remember to give your date a compliment or two. Try not to go overboard though, you don’t want to seem needy or psycho. “You look nice” or ” You have great taste” are some compliments you can give.

P.S.- Comments Are Appreciated!