Is it really necessary that I barf out an actual guide for catching your cheating partner? No, it’s not necessary but neither is this turban I’m wearing. Look, you and I both know that if you have to go to great links to figure out if someone is cheating on you or not, then it’s probably time to throw in the towel. If you’re like me, throwing in the towel is not an option, there is no towel therefore there is no throwing. Get it? It’s extremely easy to get a little obsessed when searching for clues, codes and hidden agendas. At some point, you need to know where to draw the line. What line? Good point. There is no line, that’s why I was telling you to draw it.
Honestly, when is enough going to be enough? You didn’t find panties in his glove compartment. Not to get off topic but I have never (not even once) ever found a glove in any glove compartment. Moving on. At some point, if you are not finding the information that you think is ‘floating’ out there, maybe the problem isn’t with your partner…maybe you have trust issues. Duh, eh? There are a few of you that are overreacting, several of you are making a mountain out of a mole hill but most of us? Most of us, we know you’re doing shit behind our back and we will catch you, we will hunt you down like the dogs that you are and then you will die. I’m not trying to scare you cheaters out there but um, I know people. The last thing you want to worry about is my involvement with the Barbie Doll Mafia.
Now, where was I? Oh yes, the following topic deserves a drum roll. (I’m just in the mood for a drum roll, let me bask in it please). *drum roll* Okay, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the number one place you are going to find the juice is *another drum roll* the phone. *gasp* “Oh nos, not the phone!” Yes, I said the phone. I know, I know..I’m pretty genius. I will not go into the long, hard man hours it took for me to come up with the hidden formula for cheaters all around the world.
man wants woman + woman wants man + both need communication – the other partner’s finding out + hidden agenda + ½ penis wrinkle + 2 blooming two lips = personal cell phone. Read the rest of this entry »
